Wednesday, 30 June 2010

How to be a happy mum

Looking around the Netmums webpage, I found this title of their latest book. I liked the last Netmums book I bought, the food one, and the one before, about toddlers to teenagers or something. Very good, written by experts AND people like you and me.

Anyway, I saw a review of this book and it included a summary of what the book covered. I thought I'd add my comments in here to the list of How to be a happy mum!

  1. Friends: why we need mum friends and how to keep them I would be at a loss without my mummy friends. I have a group of both NCT and mummy friends. We are an excellent support network and have been through so much together: PND, returning to work, miscarriage, more pregnancies... How to keep them? I have a revolving group that I see on Mondays, and another group on Fridays. Then there are the friends who live further away and I admit I have to make an effort to keep in touch and meet up with them. My friends are my life support.
  2. Sleep: Without sleep everything seems worse...here's how to get more of it Everyone is an expert. I am an expert! An expert on MY OWN CHILD that is.... We all hear the smug comments "Oh my child slept through at 3 days" and then we snigger when a year later, they visit the health visitor with "sleep issues". It's one of the most difficult things to advise on. My manager's first born slept like an angel, and she admitted to being smug a few times. When her second arrived and NEVER slept, but she was still doing the same things she'd done with the first, she realised every child is different and reacts differently. How we learn...
  3. Money and working: To work or not to work? And how on earth to juggle it all without collapsing Read a previous post on Work Life Balance to hear my view!
  4. Clutter and chaos: It shouldn't be so important but it is! Housework is the no. 1 stress factor in a recent survey of mums. Lots of ideas for how to deal with it and how to get a better sense of perspective I am still learning! I must buy this book for this chapter alone. I am about to move to a 4 bedroomed house and I am SURE that my inner domestic godess wil burst out of me the minute I cross the threshold. Watch this space...
  5. Depression and stress: Are you depressed? or just stressed? Or just exhausted? How do you know and how to you start to feel better? I think depression/stress/exhaustion are all on a continuum and we all dip into it and out of it at some time during motherhood. I know of four mummies who had PND and are now all fine, thanks to a mixture of counselling and medication (and a caring doctor). I know of one other mummy who didn't realise she had had PND until she had her second baby and DIDN'T feel the same as she felt after her first. A good network of friends can help and support you through this.
  6. The unexpected (or the stuff life throws at us): There's always something isn't there? Just when you think you've made it, something else comes along. How to cope with the unexpected and what to expect from life. What to expect from life? Haven't all of our priorities changed? And just when you think you have Problem X sorted, along comes Challenge Y.
I personally think I am quite a happy mummy, thanks to a loving family, brilliant and supportive friends (both mummy and otherwise), a good doctor and health visitor, an understanding manager at work, and last but by no means least, a great acupuncturist!

2 comments:

  1. Friends... we all need them. Even if they are 'only' our online friends.

    ReplyDelete
  2. MetroMum - I wrote this a while ago and omitted to include my online friends. I posted a call for advice on boys'n'guns a while back and had a great response and some really good advice. - HMx

    ReplyDelete

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