Skip to main content

I'm too busy!
























I've just read an essay, The Busy Trap by Tim Kreider, published in the NYT some weeks ago. 


You've probably already seen it via Facebook or Twitter, if you haven't been too busy to read it... According to Kreider,


Busyness serves as a kind of existential reassurance, a hedge against emptiness; obviously your life cannot possibly be silly or trivial or meaningless if you are so busy, completely booked, in demand every hour of the day.
Today I am having a rare day off, I say rare as now that I work in a school, my time off coincides with Elf's. He has been shipped off to daycamp today, along with 3 of his besties, so he can have a day of fun while I catch up with the housework no that's a lie, while I laze around reading! Which is exactly what I've done. (I did get up at 7.45 to get his lunch ready, but went back to bed until 11am to read my book). Bliss.


I have friends who pack too much in, whether that's to hide what might be missing were they not in demand, or just out of maternal guilt - "We have to do things for the kids". One friend had PND and one major remedy was to only plan one thing a day. Anything else is a bonus. That's what I've done these holidays, a plan to meet up with a friend, then see how the day goes. Yesterday a picnic lasted 4 hours, and we found time for a quick swim at the beach. 


Another friend made herself ill after taking on too much voluntary and community projects after quitting work because she was ill from doing too much. I know people who say "Let's meet up" but can't book you in for weeks. Do they do that to everyone? When do they start asking? A month in advance? Can't they sit down for a moment? Do they need to publish a list on Facebook of their achievements of the day? Are we impressed? Should we be?


What do we have against idleness? My day will be lazy, I might go to town later or I might not. I might leave the house, I might not. Why should I feel guilty? I do slightly though, as if my day has had no purpose. I hope Mr Humdrum doesn't come home asking if I've done any washing! I've already had some people saying "Me time, I'd kill for that". Well, do it! Kreider calls it a boast masquerading as a complaint. Hear instead "I can't possibly have any me time, that would entail asking someone else for help, or showing that I need some down time, maybe people will think I can't cope. Or they'll think that I'm not important." Bollocks.


Laziness and idleness should be redefined as quiet time or just down time. I'm not going to catch up on housework, I might just flick a wipe round the bathroom. The sun is coming out now, why don't I take my book to the beach with a thermos of tea? Sod it, that's what I'll do. Bye then!

Popular posts from this blog

He's back and I didn't miss him - shock!

His shoes lay strewn near the front door. ACDC riffs belt out from the amp in the front room. My head throbs. Peace reigned for five days. Five long, lazy days. Now that peace is shattered. The boy is back. But - prepare yourself for the shock - I didn't miss him! The school parents' Facebook chat page buzzed while they were away at their Year 5 residential. I started a thread asking if any other parents had received their postcard. We were asked to pack a stamped addressed card. I had but some other parents didn't, making them feel totally rejected! One mum forgot and felt awful. It was on this thread that it appeared I was the only parent who didn't miss their little bundle of joy! Other mums described tears at bedtime the night before. Tears when they were pulling away on the coach. And this was boys, actually, not girls. I jokingly said I was certainly going to win the Worst Parent Award for this half-term. One mum replied that I'd raised an independent boy ra...
Post a Comment
Read more

Ms Humdrum reviews: The Taken escape room from Escape London

YES we found Bob! Escape rooms seem to be the new thing. You pay to be locked into a room, with your goal being to escape! But it’s a little more than that. Teamwork aids the solving of puzzles and challenges, with clues around you, be it icons or codes. There is not always just one room; often a second room is there for the finding. Based around a theme, this immersive style of game has really taken off, with even my mum completing one! I was imagining a quiz based on general or specific knowledge, but no, it’s not necessary to have any prior information. Anyone can take part. Last week, on a family day out, I “Escaped” with my mum, cousin and her daughter. The rules were explained to us before we entered and we were told that while there was a camera, there was no audio. If we required help (yes you can ask for help!), we needed to dance in front of the camera and help would come via the TV screen in the room. Our theme was “Taken” - our good friend Bob had gone missing and we we...
1 comment
Read more

Would I Lie To You board family game review

Would I Lie To You? "The game of believable lies and unbelievable lies ", linked into the TV show of the same name. Purchased:  December 2017 in Waterstones, for around £20 In a nutshell: These TV show-affiliated games usually show themselves up (Never Mind The Buzzcocks, Top Gear) but this game is fun and easy to play (if a little modified) as a family. You don't really need specialist knowledge to play, just the ability to lie! Every year for Christmas, I like to buy a board game to play, even though no games better either Ludo (in which my dad is the reigning cheater-champion, and argues to high heaven over the rules about doubling up or how to place your counters in "Home") or Rummikub (which we can now play with two packs of cards lest we forget the game). This year, Would I Lie To You caught my eye in Waterstones (other emporiums - emporia? - for book lovers are [locally] unavailable). It's a game, it says, for 2-8 players; however we dec...
5 comments
Read more